The Hardest Part

I think the hardest part about being a writer is rejection.

For anyone I think it’s difficult–in relationships, denial of parental love, etc., but I think as a writer we get it on a daily basis.

Rejection.

Our work is like our baby and no matter how hard we try, sometimes we just get shit on. Sometimes in the worst way possible. What kills you is when someone takes your baby and says “Not good enough.” Or worse, when they say “I’m sorry but at this time…blah, blah, blah.” I’m tired of waiting to be approved of. I’m tired of staring at the submission screen hoping and praying that you’ll pick me.

But that’s writing, isn’t it.

My life, my career, is dependent on your opinion.

Today I was told that one of my stories on the blog was going to be published in my college’s Literary Magazine (The Great Lake Review). I am very happy that I finally got another piece of work in the magazine before graduating. (My graduation is this May). I felt a sense of accomplishment for a split second, but then I realized that I submitted four pieces of work. Out of all of that work I did, I only got one submission accepted.

This is what being a writer is. Some things get accepted and some things are not. You get told this is good, and that isn’t. I really wish I’d be given some advice about what exactly they thought was wrong or not good enough to satisfy their critical tastes.

Maybe I’m wrong. Maybe the hardest part is waiting.

Staring at your screen and waiting for that email or that phone call. Yeah…definitely the waiting. It’s that internal struggle to control your impatience. It’s that day, that week, that month or year that you hold yourself in and try to not to cry or scream. I got that today, that final sensation of release. And then came a bit of disappointment.

Now this is not to say I’m not happy about this particular development. I am happy, but I can’t help but feel impatient and a little disheartened. I wish everyone would accept my work, but I know that it’s not possible. There will be those who like your work and those who don’t. There is always room for improvement and that’s something I have to face.

The hardest part about being a writer, for me, is rejection.

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